I Feel Exactly Like This

| Monday, December 15, 2008

I'm not going to describe a thing. We are things. Human, animal, chair. Things. So I'm not going to describe it.

The feeling is a void in human conditioning. Whither it is loss, longing, love, or otherwise, I feel it right now. It's a lot like happiness and a lot like sadness. It's a lot like fear and a lot like anger.

I have wanderlust, an uncomfortable urge of wanderlust. But it has to be for now suppressed by many things. Chains do dig; mine has dug and left scars. It's unfortunate my skin burses easily.

I have to get out, one way or the other.

I Scoffed At This

| Tuesday, December 2, 2008

I shouldn't have started something I couldn't end.


I mean don't get me wrong, sometimes it's good to talk to someone that you haven't or REFUSED to talk to for some time.

*sigh*

I'm going to refer to The Raconteurs song "Many Shades of Black" to express how I really feel.

"Go ahead, go ahead and smash it (MY HEART) on the floor
Take whatever is left, and take it with you out the door (HE TOOK NOTHING)
See if I cry (I DID)
See if I shed a single sorry tear (BUT HE NEVER SAW THEM)
Can't say that it's been that great
No in fact it's been a wasted worried year (IN-FUCKING-DEED)

Everybody sees
And everyone agrees (THEY DID!!!)
That you and I are wrong
And i'ts been that way to long
Take it as it comes
And be thankful when it's done (I AM, OMG YES I AM)
There's so many ways to act
And there's many shades of black
There's so many shades of black

Let it out, let it all out
Say what's on your mind (I HAVEN'T)
You can kick and scream and shout and say things that are so unkind (I SHOULD!!!)
See if I care, see if I stand firm or if I fall
Cause in the back of my mind, and on the tip of my tongue
Is the answer to it all

Everybody sees
And everyone agrees
That you and I are wrong
And i'ts been that way to long
Take it as it comes
And be thankful when it's done (I AM)
There's so many ways to act
And there's many shades of black
There's so many shades of black"


I think that was well said

This was inevitable

| Monday, December 1, 2008

There is a point in a young persons life that they come to realize all the glitters isn't gold. Nothing is served to you on a silver platter. Nothing is for free. I truely wish all those things were true.

I was under the impression that things would get better.

I guess I just hate my job.

Fucking sucks.